Gloria Estefan

I have fallen prey to the notion that celebrities are different than you and me. Maybe it's the flash of the paparazzi or the alluring headlines of the tabloids. Now mind you, it's not the gazillions of dollars or the size of their houses that make me think mega stars are holier than thou, it's the fact that I believe my world is different than theirs. Well, Gloria Estefan has righted my thinking. Not only do we live and inhabit the same world, we think the same way. I bet you do too.

After contacting her on behalf of Living in Balance Magazine, she told me, "I was drawn to your magazine's name because if I had to choose one word that exemplifies how I live my life it would be 'balance'. My family keeps me very grounded and in tune with the things of real value in this life - like love and commitment. They nurture me and support me in everything I do." Estefan continued by defining what motivates her. "Even when I've been on the road, my children have been with me. I believe it's important for me to be with them while they grow up."

But she has her challenges too. "As a parent my biggest challenge has been keeping negative thoughts and fears out of my mind when I'm away from my children. It's the most natural thing in the world to imagine all the terrible things that could befall them. Throughout my life I've realized that it's much more fruitful to imagine them safe and happy and think that things will be fine. This, of course, must be done with conviction and belief. It's a conscious decision that I make. I do not give energy to negative thoughts. On a greater scale, each of us contributes to all the 'thoughts' that make up the world we live in. These thoughts lead to actions and events. I believe if we realized how responsible each of us are for the world that we've created, we could more easily solve our problems and attain more readily what we desire."

What throws you out of balance?, and she picked up right there. "I believe there are an abundance of lessons to be learned while we enjoy this physical experience and there are a spectrum of possibilities that can range from triumph and elation to personal tragedy. These can throw us out of balance or pull us off center. I'd like to share with your readers what it takes to get past the difficult moments. I believe all experiences can teach us valuable lessons if we are introspective and honest with ourselves. And although the pain of a tragedy is very real it helps to put it in the perspective of a 'bigger picture'. It also helps us to feel and appreciate more intensely the happy moments. My advice to staying in balance it to experience the moment and take advantage of where you are now." And then she offers ways to accomplish that. "Learning how to love unconditionally and unselfishly is, in my opinion, one of the most important lessons we can learn."

This was the point in our communication that satisfied my inflated perception of celebrities. I could see that Gloria Estefan was a woman, mother and humanitarian seeking to understand herself and her place in the world. Yes, she is a 43 year-old superstar, born in Havana, Cuba and transplanted to a small neighborhood in Miami when she was a toddler. Yes, she struggled with her shyness, but none-the-less, she thinks and acts the same way as you and me. "As a child," she shared, "others perceived me as shy but I saw myself as very content, regardless of my hardships. I've always felt very much in control-even when events haven't been what I desired them to be. It's probably because I was extremely inquisitive and had questions to which I methodically searched for answers. Some of those answers did not come until after my fortieth year, a very auspicious one for me. Something 'clicked' and put a lot of my queries into clear focus."

Estefan has always been curious about human behavior. She studied at the University of Miami and had a double major in psychology and communications with a minor in French. Today, she sees herself as a communicator. During the Elian Gonzales incident last year, Gloria did indeed become a communicator. She was a spokesperson on behalf of people's rights, writing articles for the Miami Herald and appeared on Larry King Live. We discussed her accomplishments. "I feel my greatest achievements have been a happy family, close and fulfilling friendships and being able to do what I truly love as my life's work. Being able to regain my life after a very difficult accident has also been a big achievement for me." Aware that she had undergone extensive back surgery after her bus crashed in a snowstorm in Pennsylvania in the winter of 1990, I queried her further on this topic. "I found I had discipline I never dreamed possible. I also realized I had the ability to help in the healing process. I believe we all possess the ability to help heal ourselves. Ever since I was a little girl, I have been very aware of 'energy' and 'vibrations.' Even though logic and mental analysis is crucial in any perception or decision I make, I will always give 'instinct' much more weight. It gives me a much more honest answer than my eyes or my mind."

I asked about the titanium rods in her back. "I haven't really experienced any difference in my energy since I acquired my titanium rods (they are non-magnetic) but I can foretell when it's going to rain. Since the accident, I work hard to keep my body in the best possible shape. Exercise is probably my only daily ritual (although I give myself a break on weekends). I eat healthy foods but am not fanatical about keeping to any diet. If I eat more than I should because I'm celebrating or simply 'wanted to' then I'm a little more careful for a couple of weeks. I also do Iyengar Yoga twice a week. It helps me stay in balance with the rest of my life."

We continued our discussion of accomplishments. "Many people let me know that I have been an inspiration for them during their difficult times and this also makes me very happy. Awards and acknowledgements are very nice to receive but they're just the icing on the cake." And there have been a multitude of awards including the recent Songwriters Hall of Fame, Sammy Cahn LifeTime Achievement Award (2001), Billboard Best Production - Tropical Album Female Award (2001) Numerous Grammy Awards from 1994, 1996, 2000 and 2001. Gloria also received an Oscar Nomination for her performance with N'Sync in Music of My Heart the title song to the movie of the same name starring Meryl Streep. Estefan's honors include an Honorary Doctoral Degree of Music from the University of Miami, The Alexis de Tocqueville Society - United Way Outstanding Philanthropy Award (1993), and the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

Upcoming projects for Estefan include a TV movie (she and her husband Emilio have purchased the film rights to the Brian Weiss book, Many Lives, Many Masters and an autobiography that may take ten more years to write. I asked her about this. "I've thought about writing my autobiography but I'm a very private person and might be reluctant to share intimate moments of my life. But, of course, this is what people want to read. Primarily, I'd like to write something that would empower people to feel optimistic about life. You see we are all connected and are responsible for what goes on here on our earth. We must take responsibility for each other and for the things that happen in our world."

I asked Gloria how she came to this understanding. "My Cuban heart and American head have given me a beautiful 'balance'. "There's that word again," she notes. "This is how I live my life. My mind was nurtured in American schools and my business ethic is very much 'of this country'. I was also raised in this democracy, which has shaped the way I think about social issues, politics and pluralism. Justice is important to me and I have a very open mind. My Cuban heart makes my family first and foremost. This concept includes a vast 'extended family' which includes not only blood relatives but also friends and my community. I have the best of both worlds."

And now I know there are many worlds that people live in. Some have fame, others fortune, for most of us, we have what roots us into our lives. We have our families, our friends and our communities. Aside from that, no matter what the paparazzi portrays or the tabloids say, Gloria is truly a down-to-earth woman, grounded and remarkably balanced.

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