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Happy Times Monthly - Interview with Tony Robbins
1. You have been called the “thousand watt optimist.” Where does your energy come from?
“The thousand watt optimist?” That is quite a compliment! But I want you to know that optimism and energy are not out of reach for anyone. To me, energy is life. And because I believe that, I stress the importance of physical health as a basis for an outstanding life. Physical health results in energy; an energy that gives you the ability to both growpersonally and contribute to others. And, with a life that is so fulfilled, there are no limits to what you can achieve.
2. The word “power” has many connotations, yet you profess “we have all the power we need within us.” How do we harness this power and where should it be directed?
I agree with you completely. Power does have a number of meanings, all of which I believe people carry within themselves at all times.First and foremost, I believe in the power of vision—the ability to see exactly what you want. Once you have that vision, a powerful psychology will give you the drive and the ability to figure out exactly what it takes to get there—to balance and interpret the challenges along the way and how to turn them into opportunities. Then there is the crucial power of decision. Once you absolutely commit and make your decision a must, you will be unstoppable. You will have the physical power—the energy and vitality—to do it! Your power will create a momentum by which you’ll be pulled into the compelling future you have created for yourself.
3. What produces the greatest and most lasting change in an individual?
That is a great question because there are no benefits to change if its effects don’t last. Maintaining the results of change is one ofthe most challenging things many people face and, unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, most have to hit rock bottom before they change at all. I know that was the case for me. So, I applaud people for their commitment to improving the quality of their lives.
Chances are, if you are not experiencing lasting change, it is because you are changing something for the wrong reason or there are not enough compelling reasons for why you should commit to changing in the first place. If this is true for you, you are living in a dangerous place I refer to as “No Man’s Land.” You see, in No Man’s Land, you aren’t totally happy, butthe problem is you’re not unhappy enough to do something about it. As I said, there are few, if any, compelling reasons to attempt change; therefore, youdon’t.
Now what is great is that there is a tool you can use to help discover your motivation to change. That tool is leverage. Allow me to explain: A lever is a device that we utilize in order to lift or move a tremendous burden we could not manage on our own. In my experience, 20% of any change is knowing "how to change" but 80% is knowing "why you must." Change requires more than just establishing the knowledge that you should change. It is about knowing at the deepest, most basic emotional level that you must change. If we gather a strong enough set of reasons, we can change in a minute something we’ve failed to change for years. Those reasons—the why—are what provide the leverage. And the greatest leverage you can create for yourself is the pain that comes from inside, not outside. The pain of knowing that you have failed to live up to your own standards for your life. Access enough leverage and there will be nothing you can’t change.
So ask yourself this: That thing, whatever it is you’ve been trying to change but haven’t followed through with—what will it ultimately cost you if you don’t change? And what will you ultimately gain if you do? With knowledge of the answers to those questions, you’ll be able to create lasting change in every aspect of your life.
4. On the deepest level imaginable, what do people really want?
Whenever I pose that question to people, they tend to respond with “more money, better relationships, to lose weight.” But what I have discovered over time is that overall, people are truly after an emotion—one emotion in particular: a feeling of fulfillment.
Ultimately I believe people want to be successful and feel completely fulfilled in all aspects of their lives; to feel that they serve a purpose for those around them and to know they are loved.
Once someone is living a life where they are growing personally and contributing to their family, friends, and the world around them, they will be fulfilled, and their basic human needs will be met.
5. Please define success.
Success is an interesting concept because so many people equate success with financial power and fame. But so many people who have achieved financial freedom are unhappy. Why? Because their lives lack fulfillment, and success without fulfillment is failure.
I can tell youthat after 20 years of working with some of the most powerful performers andachievers of our generation—from the business, political, financial, and athletic arenas—while it is true that those individuals who succeed may have a strategic advantage, ultimately the advantage they have is their mindset. As I stated earlier, I believe that 80% of success in life is psychology (the “why”)and 20% is mechanics (the “how”). Most people know what to do but they don’t do what they know.
In order for you to create and enjoy lasting fulfillment, you must constantly strive to maximize your potential and exceed your current standard. The individuals who become extraordinary leaders do so because they are unreasonable men and women. So, what can you do right now to be a bit unreasonable? What new standard could you set for yourself? What action could you take immediately? Who could you model? Make it a must that whenever you hear about, read, or research something you think has value for your life, don’t let it become just knowledge. Convert it into action; for it is in our actions that our destiny is shaped.
6. Please talk to us about passion. Where does it reside? How can it be activated? What role does it serve?
This is such an exciting question for me because I truly believe that passion can turn any challenge into a tremendous opportunity. If you looked at the world from that viewpoint, imagine the things you could achieve! So let’s think for a moment about what it is you’re passionate about. What do you love? What really excites you? Your answers are your passion. Passion gives life power, juice, and meaning.
Creating a compelling future requires. As it says in the Bible, Proverbs 29:18, “where there is no vision, the people perish.” And with hat vision, you will find or create the passion that will empower you to move forward. Passion is the unbridled power to move our lives to the next level ata faster tempo than ever before.
The best advice I can offer you is that finding what drives you most, or your “hot buttons,” is much more important than going to someone else to get you “pumped up.” When individuals come to me, either for one-on-one counseling or to participate in my seminars, my task is to assist them in finding, awakening, strengthening, and employing the driving force within themselves that can make anything they dream about possible, while arming them with the finest strategies available—strategies I have modeled from peak performers from multiple cultures around the world.
In fact, coming up in Fort Lauderdale in October is one of my Results 2000 seminars, which is aperfect example of a grouping of experts from many walks of life sharing their strategies for creating and maintaining a fulfilling life.
7. What have been your greatest challenges? How did you overcome them?
Thank you for that question. I appreciate it because I haveby no means always been in the position I am in now. So often people say, “it’seasy for you to say Tony, you’re rich.” Well, I remember when I was eleven years old, my family had no money, and we couldn’t afford the traditional American Thanksgiving Day feast. At best, we coulds crape together a meager meal on this traditionally festive day. I felt devastated and helpless as I watched this difficult situation lead to frustration and hopelessness and then to irreparable, harsh words between my mother and father. Then destiny intervened. We received an unexpected knock at the door—it was a man carrying a huge basket filled with food. We were stunned.
In that moment, my life was forever changed.With this simple act of kindness, I learned that hope is eternal, that people—even “strangers”—really do care. The sense of gratitude I felt moved me deeply and I swore that some day I would do well enough to give back to others in a similar way.
Years later, I was living in a 400-square-foot bachelor apartment, flat broke, and reduced to washing my dishes in my bathtub. I was extremely unhappy, thirty-eight pounds overweight, with floundering relationships and limited prospects.
Ultimately,and thankfully, I hit rock bottom. I knew that who I am as a person, mentally, emotionally, physically, financially, and spiritually, was so much more than the results I was producing in my life. The pain of who I was at that very moment became overwhelming. I’m thankful for that pain because it gave me the driving force I needed to change. The pain became so intense that my only option for survival was to take action—to summon my courage, determination, faith, compassion, and commitment to transform my life. Only then did I have a future. Only then did I stand the chance to overcome challenges that once seemed insurmountable—I learned the power of decision. And now I can tell people with absolute certainty that it is in moments of decision that our destiny is shaped.
8. Do you have any regrets?
I don’t have any regrets, but I have a lot of “learning experiences.” You see, I believe there is no such thing as failure or regret, only learning. I cherish all of my experiences because they have helped sculpt the person I am today.
To dwell on or regret something is like driving with your rearview mirror as a guide; you are destined to crash. I believe we can take from each experience in life something with which to create a solution for our future challenges. No matter how prepared you are, there’s one thing I can absolutely guarantee: If you’re on the river of life, it’s likely you’re going to hit a few rocks. The key is to take those rocks, those challenges from the past, and reevaluate them for what they really are—references by which you can make better decisions in the future.
9. What is self-mastery? Is this attainable?
Mastery to me is the ongoing process of striving to become more. It is the opportunity to continually grow emotionally, socially, spiritually, physiologically and intellectually, while contributing in some positive way to others. Again, after 20 years of observing the human spirit and mindset of the most powerful performers and achievers of our generation, I know that the greatest advantage a person can have is their mindset.
I believe there are three fundamental keys to mastery. These happen to be the three things that changed my life. And, if you really want to accelerate results, the first step, above all else, is to model someone. So that means you have to find a model. But I don’t just mean someone who is really good at what they do, I mean someone who is outstanding because they have an edge over others in the same field. Once you have that edge, you’ll reap the rewards.
The next step is total immersion. Rather than trying to fully master something one piece at a time, dive in! The faster and more immersed you are, the quicker and easier you will learn. This reminds me of the first time I played polo. A friend of mine insisted that I master this game. Soon my first day, I climbed on top of this horse named Ernie, feeling muscles I never knew I had and hanging with all the strength I could muster, when my friend left me to take a phone call. All of a sudden I heard this noise. I looked off in the distance and saw the doors open to this giant field. Then I heard horsemen chanting. Well, I didn’t know how to play polo, but Ernie did! So he took off running while I am holding onto his head for dear life. I looked up, and there was the ball, five feet from the goal. So I reached down and just hit it. And I scored! Granted I signed up for lessons shortly thereafter, but that is what I call total immersion!
The third and final step to mastery is something I call spaced repetition. In other words, although you need an outstanding model and full immersion into whatever it isyou wish to master, you also need periodic reinforcement. A good example of this spaced repetition is the coaching I offer people. For instance, if you have just attended one of my seminars, I guarantee you were totally immersed.However, without the reinforcement of what you’ve learned about yourself and the changes you must make to have the life you truly deserve, the natural process of atrophy sets in. In order to prevent this degenerative process, I developed the Results Partnership. And it is just that, a partnership system, where every couple of weeks you check in with a coach who will support you in attaining the results you desire in your life.
10. Where do limitations come from? Can anyone overcome them?
Limitations come from your beliefs—how you perceive a situation, and the meaning you give to it. You have to see things as they reallyare, but not worse than they are, which is most people’s tendency. The majority of individuals, afraid of being disappointed or appearing naive, perceive a barrier between their current situation and their true potential. This perception becomes a destructive force hampering a person’s desire to tap into his true potential or ability. Seeing a situation as it truly is allows you to make sound decisions about how to move yourself and your life to the next level!
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